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Round 1: A judge rules that the FTC does not have the authority to enforce the Do-Not-Call list, so Congress (who has the power to give the FTC that authority) passes a law explicitly granting it to the FTC. So far so good. Checks and balances are working as they’re supposed to.

Round 2: Another judge rules that the list is unconstitutional because it discriminates against commercial calls. Never mind that that traditionally, commercial speech does not have the same protections as personal, political, and other forms of speech. (Consider truth-in-advertising laws.)

The way I see it, there are two obvious solutions: Either appeal the ruling (which is inevitable) or comply with it by removing the loopholes for charities and political campaigns. Which would probably get them in more first amendment trouble.

So today, the FCC has said they will enforce the list right on schedule. OK, it’s something I wouldn’t have thought of… mainly because it doesn’t seem like it would solve the problem.

Now, I hate getting calls from telemarketers, but I just don’t see how shuffling the list to another agency resolves the problem of constitutionality. I’ve only skimmed the ruling [previously available from the court’s website] (it’s 34 pages and I’m at work, it’s not as if I can read the whole thing right now!), but it seems pretty clear on the point that (as the judge sees it) it’s the federal government that can’t enforce the list in its present form, not the FTC specifically.

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1. You can disagree with or dislike people in your government, from your city council up through the President, and still love your country. (Conservatives disliked the President for 8 years; denying that privilege to the rest of us is hypocrisy at best.)

2. You can oppose war – or a particular war – without being anti-American. Speaking out against your nation’s policies and actions is not treason, it is necessary for a free society. If no one disagrees with the official policy, and that policy turns out to be a mistake – say, slavery, for instance – the mistake will never be corrected.

3. No, being a movie star does not make you an expert on politics. Neither does being a country singer. But neither job makes your opinion matter any less than anyone else’s.

4. America is not and should not be a theocracy. Freedom of religion does not exist without freedom from religion. If you are free to attend a Lutheran service only if you also attend a Catholic mass, you don’t have freedom of religion. If you can practice Christianity at home but your children are expected to recite Allah Akbar daily in school, you don’t have freedom of religion. This doesn’t mean that you can’t pray the way you want to. It does mean you cannot coerce me into praying the way you want me to.

5. Remember, the first amendment is there to protect unpopular speech. The popular speech doesn’t need protecting. And not everyone is offended by the same things.

6. The right to speak freely does not compel others to listen. You always have the right to turn the radio to another station, hang up the phone, or walk away. If I don’t want you to call or email me, I have the right to block you, and as long as the choice is mine, there is no reason I can’t let someone else handle the administrative details – whether it’s a restraining order against a stalker, a spam blacklist, or a do-not-call list.

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Yes, you!

Girl Genius, by Phil and Kaja Foglio: “A gaslamp fantasy with adventure, romance, and mad science.” It’s a continuing steampunk adventure/comedy set in an alternate 19th century where warring mad scientists (or “sparks” as they’re called to their faces) have devastated Europe. Graduate student Agatha Clay belatedly discovers her own “spark” as she is whisked into the world of Klaus von Wulfenbach, the “spark” who has conquered most of Europe. A fun read every time – it’s a real pity that it only comes out four times a year. (Published quarterly by Studio Foglio/Airship Comics.) Edit: The comic is now available online at girlgeniusonline.com!

Fables, by Bill Willingham and various artists. Imagine if all the fairy tales really did happen. But Snow White, the big bad wolf, and the rest have been forced out of their world and into ours, where they live in an expatriate community in modern New York City. Here, they face everything from murder mysteries and personal intrigue to political infighting and all-out revolution. It is R-rated, so you probably wouldn’t want to hand it to an 8-year old, but if you liked Sandman you should check this out. It’s a mix of multi-part story-lines and single-issue stories. DC has been collecting each storyline in graphic novel form. (Published monthly by DC Comics/Vertigo.)

Halo and Sprocket, by Kerry Callen. In the words of the comic’s own website, “Halo is an angel assigned to assist Sprocket in learning about the human condition from Katie. [Ed. note: no, not that Katie!] But Sprocket’s logic, Halo’s metaphysics, and Katie’s real-life antics don’t always mesh.” Each issue features several stand-alone short stories that find the comedy in even the most ordinary situations, as well as the contradictions and foibles of humanity. Wayne brought the first three issues over one time, and everyone was laughing hysterically! A collection of the first four issues should be out by December. (Published several times a year by Amaze Ink/SLG Publishing)

And while you’re at it, check out the graphic novel Midnight Nation, by J. Michael Straczynski and Gary Frank. The collected edition is a bit pricey, but it’s worth it!

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Aaagh. Every time we try to get something going on wedding planning, we find more reasons to scrap the whole thing. Last month we got soured on a whole lot of aspects with one series of tours, and we just managed to get ourselves out of the house on the subject again today.

I had vowed at the beginning of this to avoid David’s, the Wal-Mart of bridal stores, like the plague. However, being this close and having nothing to show for it but a pair of shoes, toasting glasses, and a cake server has begun to freak me out, so I braved the place. I remembered walking in and being accosted by a plethora of pushy, smiley salestwigs who wanted us to try on all sorts of stuff. Not this time. Turns out the place is having a sale, and as a result was completely packed. And sometime between 2000 and 2003, they made appointments mandatory for bridal tryons. So here I am, getting wonderful upper-arm exercise pawing through the racks, trying to get the attention of someone who won’t even take the time to ask if I have an appointment, and nobody bothers to tell me that I need one. For half an hour. So they’re off my list, again.

Then we get home and there’s another piece of paper spam for a hotel offering reception sevices. Since there’s no way my hair could make a standard-time-slot morning wedding on time, we’re looking at afternoon, which means a dinner reception. Their cheapest dinner is $31.95 a plate, not including 19% gratuity and 7.75% sales tax, which makes it $40.97 a person. And depending on what the “chef’s choice” of vegetable might be, Kelson might not be able to eat it. No, thank you.

Vegas is looking pretty and shiny again.

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Yes, it’s real! Last week Katie remarked we were running low on coffee, and I remembered an article on MozillaZine a few weeks ago about RJ Tarpley’s Mozilla Coffee. I figured, what the heck, let’s order some. It’s a way to get coffee and support Mozilla at the same time.

An open box containing a bag of Mozilla Coffee.

We went out for a late lunch/early dinner today, and as we came up the stairs we noticed a note tucked into the doorframe. At first I figured UPS had left a “sorry we missed you” note, but when we got up to the landing, the doormat was propped up on a six inch tall box! (That and it turned out to be FedEx, but I digress.) “Hey, no one will notice if we hide this under the doormat!”

We haven’t tried it yet, but we’ll post the results of our taste-test once we do.

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One of the new comics I picked up this week was Teen Titans. It reminded me of something that’s been bugging me about the previous issue. (Spoilers follow!)

My first thought was that there was no way Deathstroke would kill Wintergreen (his best friend and partner in the assassination “business”). But the more I thought about it, I realized he would do it if he thought it was necessary – just as he bit the figurative bullet and killed his own son when that was necessary (way back in Titans Hunt).

But he would not mount his head on the wall with his hunting trophies!

The revelation at the end of this week’s issue goes a little way towards explaining it, but it still doesn’t quite make sense, even if we’re looking at a Wildebeest connection.